Can’t See [Part 1]
If I am being honest, we seldom meal plan and often fly by the seat of our paints. Mondays are dancing. Tuesdays are track round one and scouts and retreat meetings. Wednesdays are choir. Thursdays are track round two. I’m the kids uber driver and Alesha takes care of the babies.
With all the moving parts, two big kids and two babies, we usually are finishing meals and going to bed all at the same times. Both babies cranky, the big kids still doing doing homework, fighting to take baths and trying to excite the babies. “Dad! I was just trying to help!” Welcome to our chaos. I believe that God gives special grace to parents, cause, well, kids live to be adults.
In all the commotion, it’s not often I get to put our 3 year old to bed. Every night in a last ditch effort to stall, we hear the cry, “It’s mommy’s turn.” And it’s always mommy’s turn. However, last week I got not one, but two nights to rock and put him to bed. I cherish these moments, as I know all too well, they’ll be gone soon.
With the lights off, noise maker on and the fan off, he doesn’t like the fan, we sat in the rocker. Blanket in hand and snuggled in my arms. Me singing “twinkle” and “hush baby.” All the sudden I hear “Can’t see you.” “I know buddy, it’s dark, but I got you. I’m not going anywhere.” After songs and prayers, I tucked him into bed and heard it again. “Can’t see you, dad.” “I’m right here buddy. I love you.” “Love you. Night dad.”
As I reflected on both those nights last week, both times the same exclamation, “Can’t see you.” One time in my arms and one time with me standing right there, I could hear God saying, “I’m right here. I’m holding you. Trust me.”
Have you ever felt that way with God? “Can’t see you.” Has something gone wrong or not like you planned. Have you questioned his invitations to new adventures cause you weren’t sure if it was Him. Cause you couldn’t see Him.
No matter what is going on, He’s got you. He’s with you. He’s holding you. Even if you, in the moment, can’t see Him.
What a great reminder in this season of Lent.